Thursday, March 13, 2008

We are in Vancouver

We have activated Renee's cell phone, so you can call us on that at 778-868-3195. We hope to do some relaxing. We are booked at http://www.pennysplacevancouver.com/

email from Mike http://www.wyamvancouver.com/
All glory to God. We came to an agreement today at 4:45 pm to purchase the 9000 sq ft property at 1845 Napier street. We will be putting down $225,000 toward the total price of $1,200,000.

Thank you to all of you who have been praying and standing with us during this amazing process. This is a great victory as we see land purchased for the kingdom in our city.

The building is secure and now we have time to be able to fund raise for the balance without the pressure of a pending deadline.

Tomorrow (Thursday) we fly out to Indonesia, so the timing has been absolutely amazing.

Many Blessings to you all.

Mike, Jennifer, Jonathan, Tessa and Rebecca
YWAM Vancouver

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Signing Day

We are heading to Vancouver tomorrow for a memorial on Saturday. Today we spent the afternoon signing papers we didn't want to sign.
Greg came for lunch and H&M and boys brought supper - home made pizza.
www.ywamVancouver.com needs another $100,000 tomorrow to close the deal on a building ideally suited for the ministry in Vancouver. Won't you come alongside and help? For Renee?

Sunday, March 09, 2008

Today

Went to church in the morning - mom & dad came for lunch. V & A and K & H came for evening.
Mom sang her lullaby, that she invented for me. Dad said it was a special lullaby she only sang for me, her first born son.

Something new - Can you perceive it?

Delbert Enns
www.Eastview.org

How are we going to get out the pew and do something? When are we going to chase after God? When are we going to sit and absorb God? Will God have to lead us into a desert?
Do we believe God can make a difference? Are you willing to sign up to make a difference?
God is doing Holy interruptions. He wants a covenant with you. I know God is working in my life because He is working in others. Isaiah 43:1-4
What do you perceive? People digging into the Word. Cycles of love. Isa 11:1-2 Let us leave the spirit of self serving and walk in the fear of the Lord. Seek God in prayer and fasting. Youth that are bold for Jesus. Celebrate a new Jerusalem in our lives. The point of walking with God is not to arrive -but to walk with Him. Expect God to show up this week.

Saturday, March 08, 2008

Can't sleep

why did we not stop the chemo friday? why did we not stop them from giving her so much fluid monday to maintain blood pressure? fluids that eventually caused her lungs to fail and her co2 to go up causing the septic shock. we knew better. Kris was killed by a doctor that ordered higher fluid levels than necessary. if we had not had the unnecessary business stress would we have had our brains in gear?
I watched Renee's last moments of video. I have never seen anything as heart wrenching. should we post that so her friends can see it too? never have I seen her so vulnerable. she was always brave. but she was afraid. really afraid of the leukemia. she didn't want to know the results of the tests by the Vancouver doctors.

Friday, March 07, 2008

Today

We met with friends at Cora's for brunch. We did that yesterday with Cal & Anna at the other Cora's. This evening we went to Henry and Esther for a delicious supper. Booked tickets to Vancouver. Tried to figure out what to do to get license to drive Renee's car to Manitoba. Sure don't like dealing with Death Certificates.
We decided that we are at the anger stage of grief. The next minute we aare back at pain. Then regrets and what-ifs. were we negligent? Sure feels like it. We should have stopped the chemo on Friday and insisted on treatment for Renee's retching stomach. How can she forgive us? We failed her. Oh miserable creatures we are!
Then we think about the messages by Dr Keller. Renee really enjoyed those messages. Job suffered. Powerful messages. I'd recommend them to everyone.

Thursday, March 06, 2008

Thanks for the visit

Cousin Bernie and Marie dropped in for a while this evening. Much appreciated. Kara is editing (and figuring out how to do it on Renee's Apple) the various videos taken during the Memorial services, to make one nice memorial video. We'd be very happy to send you a copy on request - when it is done.
Went for lunch with Cal & Anna and Alayna & Kara. Justin is back at work at Subway McIvor. Alayna is feeling very overwhelmed with how she will ever catch up with all the assignments at university.
Dan has offered to drive Renee's car back from BC. Need to book tickets for us all ASAP.
I added links of blogs that I found that refer to Renee. If you know of any others, please let me know so I can add them. It is so good to read all the Tributes from so many of Renee's friends. Yesterday Kara sobbed the question - Was Renee's life in vain? How has she impacted people for good? How many people have actually changed their lives for the better as a result of Renee's life?
Are we more compassionate now than we were? Are we more committed to Christ than before?

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Vancouver Memorial for Renee

Vancouver Memorial Service for Renee Amaryah Lalani Dueck

Vancouver East Side Vineyard Church

7 pm Saturday March 15, 2008

1648 1st Avenue East
Vancouver, BC V5N 1A7, Canada
(604) 255-4463

Feel free to invite your friends that live in the area.

Friends will be given an opportunity to share tributes, etc

We will provide copies of The Living LifeLight to those attending, in memory of Renee. Martha took the cover picture in 2005 in Central Park. In lieu of flowers please send a donation in Renee's memory to http://www.ywamvancouver.com

Thanks for the messages of support and the tributes to Renee's life. We hope to reply individually to the hundreds of emails over the next few weeks. Please send more so we'll have plenty of quality material to print a book. Renee was writing html code before I knew what it was and maintaining her own websites. Does anyone know if any of them are still up?


Thanks to Angela and Leigh for editing Renee? Earth, Fire, Water, Wind dramatic production.

We as a family would like to plant a tree in Vancouver ? where? one has already been planted in the Holy Land in Renee's memory.

What to do about Renee's car? Would someone in BC like to buy it? Or would someone be able to drive it to Manitoba in the next month or two? If so, Alayna would like to have it.

We are home this week and next, leaving for Vancouver on the 12th (I hope) returning on the 17th for Renee's birthday on the 18th. We plan to leave for New York some time after that to clean up the apartment and to spend time with friends and family.

Renee felt an urgency to print this prayer before she left Vancouver for the last time. She kept it in her backpack until the last admission to hospital. We found it on her windowsill when we were packing her things.


ST. PATRICK'S BREASTPLATE 387-461 AD
I bind unto myself today
The strong Name of the Trinity,
By invocation of the same
The Three in One and One in Three.

I bind this today to me forever
By power of faith, Christ's incarnation;
His baptism in Jordan river,
His death on Cross for my salvation;
His bursting from the spicèd tomb,
His riding up the heavenly way,
His coming at the day of doom
I bind unto myself today.

I bind unto myself the power
Of the great love of cherubim;
The sweet 'Well done' in judgment hour,
The service of the seraphim,
Confessors' faith, Apostles' word,
The Patriarchs' prayers, the prophets' scrolls,
All good deeds done unto the Lord
And purity of virgin souls.

I bind unto myself today
The virtues of the star lit heaven,
The glorious sun's life giving ray,
The whiteness of the moon at even,
The flashing of the lightning free,
The whirling wind's tempestuous shocks,
The stable earth, the deep salt sea
Around the old eternal rocks.

I bind unto myself today
The power of God to hold and lead,
His eye to watch, His might to stay,
His ear to hearken to my need.
The wisdom of my God to teach,
His hand to guide, His shield to ward;
The word of God to give me speech,
His heavenly host to be my guard.


Against the demon snares of sin,
The vice that gives temptation force,
The natural lusts that war within,
The hostile men that mar my course;
Or few or many, far or nigh,
In every place and in all hours,
Against their fierce hostility
I bind to me these holy powers.


Against all Satan's spells and wiles,
Against false words of heresy,
Against the knowledge that defiles,
Against the heart's idolatry,
Against the wizard's evil craft,
Against the death wound and the burning,
The choking wave, the poisoned shaft,
Protect me, Christ, till Thy returning.


Christ be with me, Christ within me,
Christ behind me, Christ before me,
Christ beside me, Christ to win me,
Christ to comfort and restore me.
Christ beneath me, Christ above me,
Christ in quiet, Christ in danger,
Christ in hearts of all that love me,
Christ in mouth of friend and stranger.


I bind unto myself the Name,
The strong Name of the Trinity,
By invocation of the same,
The Three in One and One in Three.
By Whom all nature hath creation,
Eternal Father, Spirit, Word:
Praise to the Lord of my salvation,
Salvation is of Christ

--
Raymond and Martha Dueck
Renee's blog at http://reneedueck.blogspot.com/
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=747310337
Martha's blog http://marthadueck.blogspot.com/
See our pictures at http://www.dueckpics.blogspot.com/
Support our favorite charity www.TheLifeLight.com

Tribute from Tanya

Okay after bawling for the last couple hours like a baby I think I've pulled myself together enough to be able to share some random Renee memories.
The first time I met Renee was before she started high school in Riverton at a Youth Club Meeting in Mennville that Julie invited me to. I thought Renee was older because she seemed so mature and she was just so grown up and sophisticated and hung out with older cool people I guess.
I knew when Renee started in Riverton I wanted to be her friend. I asked her if she was smart and she kind of just brushed it off. But she was. She was so smart. She was the smartest person in our class. I kind of felt like she bumped me off my throne at first. I was not that humble;) but I was like, I can't even hate her because she's sooo nice! She taught me humility. To temper my ambition, I didn't have to be the smartest or the best, she didn't even care that she was. I kind of stopped caring about that stuff for a its own sake too.
I remember how she loved coffee and introduced me to cappuccino ice cream. I was over one time and she showed me how you could just sprinkle cappuccino mix on vanilla to make it. It was so good.
She liked to talk on the phone for hours.
She was all about Beaver Creek Bible Camp.
She loved candy.
WE were the worst students in Drivers Ed. WE talked all the time. Mr. K. even told us to shut up once. A teacher never told me to shut up before. It didn't bother Renee;)
One time when Dustin and I were talking about how beautiful our sisters were and how insecure it made us feel, Renee told us how smart Alayna was and that she skipped a grade and was so much smarter than she was and how the real good piano player in the family was Justin and how she just didn't compare.
She was so close to her family and her cousins were her bestest friends, Monique, Karen, etc.
She always kept in touch with friends from camp and around the world.
She'd take us on slurpee runs in her Tundra. It was so fun. We'd ride it over te bump in Riverton and go flying and shout Ri'ton!
She was a good photographer and yearbook editor. She put so much work into it and did so well.
Her and Dustin were such a pair. They were crazy. They would eat chocolate covered coffee beans before class with Mr. K and were banned from sitting in the front row. They also took a self study "Art" class in the lunch room one semester and spent the majority of the time goofing off.
Sometimes they picked on me but it was because they liked to get a rise out of me then insist I had anger management issues.
They wrote a short story about an inside out man because one day before a science test while we were sitting in the hall we were pondering what would happen if your stomach just continued to digest and turned you inside out!? (Get an ulcer like a normal person but for some reason we figured it would turn you inside out) anyways from what I remember I got to become the monster inside out person in the story and I was a bully so they wanted to give me a bully name. So I said "Martha". I just always thought of that as a girl bully name but Renee explained that was her Mothers name! Sorry:)
She wore make up so beautifully. Just simple light blush and demure brown eyeliner and mascara. She had good cheekbones and was so beautiful.
I loved her hair. Recently it was a different color everytime I saw her and she could pull off no hair better than Britney Spears!
We would argue with Mrs. E. about what we thought the theme in the short story was.
We argued with our whole class in science about the ethical considerations of cloning and growing people spare parts. I don't even care anymore if people abused the technology or the world became over populated I would've done it all.
I remember she had such an excellent memory. She could remember notes we'd taken from the beginning of the year!
She liked going to the Mexican restaurant uptown for lunch, or to the Arborg bakery.
I was so excited when she and Dustin and I got to go to mini-u. WE had so much fun that week. She dressed up as a punk and had little punk pigtails and I died my hair red and Dustin dressed up to and we went to seven eleven and you'd have sworn we were either drunk or high on something. Renee always was high on life and friends and good times and laughter. WE went to her cousin Krista's play at PET West Side Story.
I have a picture of her jumping out of the bathroom in that hotel for my surprise 17th party. That was so fun.
WE went to a retreat in Steinbach in a 70's Parisienne with velvet seats. It was awesome. We crimped each other's hair. I think we nearly drove Mark and Ryan mad on the way back in a snow storm playing the alphabet game giggling the whole time. She was the best girlfriend to get crazy stupid girly giggly with:)
At another retreat I got her to trim my bangs with nail scissors I think. She introduced me to Dutch Blitz.
WE took turns waiting in Trina's car and waiting behind the Winnipeg Arena for the bands to come out after the Nickelback concert we went to in -30 January weather the day before our Chem final in grade twelve. WE got McDonald's after and some boys I think were being stupid came in the wrongside of the driveway and had the nerve to be mad at us!
WE went camping in Arnes with the youth group in May and decided to try out the water. Never been so cold in my life.
She had the coolest hairstyle at Grad. She didn’t have an escort so I talked my little brother Barry into walking her in because it would be cute. I said, "Renee, Barry would love to be your escort." and she just laughed because he was standing there with his little ten year old head cocked to one side and his eyes reaching into the back of his head with his mouth open:)
I was sure lucky she didn't want to go to University right after high school because she probably would have gotten all the scholarships. She could've done anything she wanted to and she did. She wanted to help people find God and she did. I always thought of missionaries as old people but she was pretty cool.
It sucked she moved away though...
I remember her Mom made such good dinners when we came over like chicken cordon bleu.
You guys were so good to Tomoko:)
She got to go to such cool places like Europe, Cambodia etc. and wasn't even just being a tourist, she was helping people:)
I remember when she came back everything had to be spicy. WE went to Moxies once and she got this spicy dish she ordered about as hot as it came and she didn't think it was that hot but I tried it later as mild as it came and I nearly croaked!
She introduced me to Sukothai Restaurant.
She wouldn't order seafood here, not since she had it fresh on the West coast.
She was always up for cheesecake or ice cream.
One year I swore off cheese for lent and she swore off chocolate. So she was living with her aunt for senior year and she made a chocolate cake. My Amma made a cheesecake. WE brought a piece to school each and switched. Worked out beautifully:)
WE had so much fun doing karaoke at her eighteenth birthday.
WE were so excited she got to finish high school with us when her family moved to Winnipeg.
She was a true friend. I had a little fit in the fall of grade twelve and she and our other friends bought me flowers even when I wasn't talking to them. Talk about regrets...
WE went greek a couple times in Osborne Village and had dinner at Basil's and Papa George's. Of course it was so cool Renee got to go to the Olympics in Greece.
I remember she was proud of one of her scripts being selected to be produced at school last year. It sure sounded cool.
I remember freaking out about her relationship status on Facebook being not single 'cause she was seeing someone. She said he didn't really speak English and they had already run out of things to talk about when I asked her about how it was going.
She always saw the coolest movies, independent films...
She always came to visit me. I think she may be my only friend that has seen all the places I used to live in in Winnipeg...She was so good bout keeping in touch. I wish I could have caught her last time she was in Winnipeg, I wish I had a passport so I could've come see her in NY I wish I called when I could have:)
She was definitely an Osborne Village punk. It was so cool she cared to work at a Fair trade store in the Forks but it sucked they didn't appreciate her.
I think she kept in touch with Dustin better than anyone else from our class did which was awesome because Dustin needed a real friend ...and I'll try to do better now I can't think well she has Renee.
I wasn't even worried when I heard she had leukemia. I was like oh that sucks but I'm sure she'll be fine. And she was for a while and I really can't believe this happened.
It sure sucks she’s not going to get married, have babies, come visit me anymore, make a cool movie or TV show but I'm sure glad I got the memories with her I did.
I know it must suck so much worse for you guys but I hope this helps somewhat because I found talking with Dustin and laughing over memories of Renee helped me.
Well that’s really all I can think of right now. I will try send the pictures I have here but most of them are at my Mom's in Hecla. I'll see you guys on the weekend.
Take Care!
Love,
Tanya

Earth, Fire, Water, Wind

Renee wrote and performed in this dramatic reading, that has blessed people around the world. This video was part of the memorial service.

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Monday, March 03, 2008

Renee's Wave USA video

Produced in 2005

Renee's earthly resting place

Mennville Church graveyard with the Mennville school in the background. Renee went to that school from K - 10.
Sunset.
Pallbearers Justin, Alayna, Monique, Krista, Lynne

Mom writing her last farewell.


CBC Radio Afternoon show

Live interview at 3 pm today

Paralyzed! living the what-ifs

we feel so exhausted. paralyzed. waiting for someone to call. to distract us. don't have the energy to dial. everyone is busy with their own lives. our thoughts keep going back to the what-ifs.
what-if
what-if this
what-if that
what-if they had started aggressive treatment sooner
what-if they had used a lower dose of chemo
what-if
what-if
how can we live with the what-ifs?
how can we make the what-ifs go away?
i'm tired
i can't deal with the what-ifs
i'm paralyzed

Sunday, March 02, 2008

Beautiful Memorial for Renee

We had a wonderful, sad, overwhelming, devastating, joyful memorial for Renee at Eastview last night. I'm too overwhelmed to say much more. Hopefully we will have a video on line soon. Pictures. Renee was writing html code before I knew what it was and maintaining her own websites. I wonder if any of them are still up?

Another memorial today in Riverton and then the final see-you-later at the gravesite in Mennville.

We'd like to have a memorial in Vancouver on the coming weekend.